A: Making humanity obsolete
Q: Who is Watson, the Jeopardy robot?
IBM must really want to destroy the world, because they’ve invented a machine that can beat humans (nerds) at Jeopardy. From the IMB website:
Code-named “Watson” after IBM founder Thomas J. Watson, the IBM computing system is designed to rival the human mind’s ability to understand the actual meaning behind words, distinguish between relevant and irrelevant content, and ultimately, demonstrate confidence to deliver precise final answers.
Those machines are crafty. On the surface, answering Jeopardy questions seems like a cute gimmick that could eventually lead to many practical applications, but that’s how it starts. If machines can beat us at Jeopardy, then there will be no way for college graduates to hope to make money, and then people will stop going to college all together! Then we’ll all be too dumb to put together a resistance when the machines use their Jeopardy winnings to buy up all our real-estate for their “processing” factories. It’s that simple.
The only problem with their plan is that robots don’t really play well with the elderly, who might just stop watching Jeopardy all-together. Then we’d all have to deal with our elderly relatives calling us all the time and, even though that’s annoying, it’s no apocalypse.
In summary, do the right thing and watch Wheel of Fortune to send the television executives the message that we’ll only watch robots who have lots of lights and make neat noises and absolutely never talk.
